Here are some of "Rodney Dangerfield" original quotes. Enjoy!
* I know what day of the week you were born. I was so poor growing up. If I wasnt born a boy, Id have nothing to play with.
* A girl phoned me the other day and said Come on over, theres nobody home. I went over. Nobody was home.
* During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me. Just the other night she called me from a hotel.
* One day as I came home early from work, I saw a guy jogging naked. I said to the guy, Hey buddy, why are you doing that? He said, Because you came home early.
* Its been a rough day. I got up this morning, put on a shirt and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase, and the handle came off. Im afraid to go to the bathroom.
* I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.
* I worked in a pet store and people would ask how big I would get.
* My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.
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