Ways To Tell Somebody is Stoopid !!!!

If she moved any slower, she'd rust.
If she was any dumber, she'd be a green plant.
If stupidity hurt, he'd go through life on a morphine drip.
If stupidity were a crime, he'd be number one on the Most Wanted list.
If the government ever declared war on stupidity, he'd get nuked.
If there were a merciful God he'd be dead by now.
If they each had half a brain, they'd still only have half a brain.
If they knock heads, implosion will suck all the air out of the room.
If what you don't know can't hurt you, she's practically invulnerable.
If you called him a wit, you'd be half right.
If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you get change back.
If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.
Ignorant, and proud of it.
Immune from any serious head injury.

Perfect face for Halloween.
Too dumb to be bothered when publicly displaying her ignorance.
Too dumb to know when you're getting smart/playing dumb with him.
Too many bad drugs, not enough good drugs.
Too many birds on her antenna.
Too many jokers and not enough aces in his deck.
Too many stop bits in his transmissions.
Too much yardage between the goal posts.
Too pointless to even be called a pinhead.
Too slow to catch a cold.
Too tall for his blood supply.
Took a spacewalk in the asteroid belt without his helmet.
Top paddock is full of rocks.
Tough as toenails after a hot bath.
Toys in the attic.
Train of thought derailed/still boarding at the station/has no caboose.
Traveling faster than light, but left his sneakers behind.
Traveling without a passport/towel.
Tried to reinvent the wheel but ended up with a flat tire.
Tried welding two 2x4s together and burned down his house.
Trips over cordless phones.